


Creeper

by TinderWulf



Category: Mass Effect - All Media Types
Genre: F/M, Halloween, Normandy Fun, thorian creepers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-12
Updated: 2018-10-12
Packaged: 2019-08-01 05:11:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 991
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16278365
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TinderWulf/pseuds/TinderWulf
Summary: Shepard remembers past Halloween pranks and debates on how to celebrate their first Halloween post-war.FB Challenge





	Creeper

**Author's Note:**

> A little one-shot for the Halloween themed challenge in the Mass Effect Fanfiction Writers group on FB.

* * *

Celebrating fun human holiday’s on the _Normandy_ always confused the non-humans. Pranks were encouraged and Shepard thought it best to lead by example.

During their hunt for Saren, she’d worked really hard on several decorations. More specifically, Thorian Creepers. Thinking back, it was kind of mean. Especially since Wrex had told her in confidence how much the plant-based slaves freaked him out. But she’d been unable to resist setting up a creeper near his nest.

Then another in the men’s bathroom.

Shepard had waited in the shadows for Wrex. Each step the krogan took was joined with curses that fell from his mouth. Curses to her for leaving _the damned plant zombie_ peeking out at him between crates near his nest.

But it didn’t prepare her for the reaction she was watching in what felt like slow motion.

The men’s bathroom door slid open, the lights flickering on, and a loud high-pitched scream unbefitting such a large krogan bounced off of the metal. Shepard smiled in glee as Wrex stumbled backwards, tripped over his own feet, and crashed to the floor.

Then a horrid smell slammed into her as she was doubled over in laughter.

Urdnot Wrex, krogan battlemaster, had shit himself.

It was a memory she enjoyed going back to.

During the Reaper War, it had been a little more difficult to get into the fun Halloween spirit. But watching Wrex become more paranoid as the big day drew closer and closer had helped her.

For the two days before Halloween, Shepard had left Thorian creeper parts in various places. A hand here, a foot there. Wrex was terrified. But with Urdnot Eve on the ship, he played it off with fake laughter. Watching the krogan peek around every corner had been amusing.

But Shepard liked to leave things in places her crew wouldn’t expect. Like a creeper head in the refrigerator.

Watching Wrex play off a girly scream had been one of the most wonderful things she’d experienced in her life. Especially since most of the crew were there to see it happen. And Eve.

She’d gotten an ear full from the _manly_ krogan later.

Now though, with the war gone and the galaxy rebuilding, she wasn’t sure what she could do to freak people out. There were plans to hold a Halloween party in her apartment and she’d let EDI take care of the decorations.

It was more of a traditional type of décor. Not really Shepard’s taste, but she was sure she’d played the creeper as much as she could. Then there was her costume. Currently nothing. She could come as herself since she was considered a zombie, a least to Joker. Or she could come as her clone. Both of which sounded utterly boring. Her first chance to actually wear a costume and she could think of nothing.

* * *

Thanks to EDI and her downloaded sewing skills, Shepard was sporting an Alliance themed cheer uniform. It wasn’t very inventive, she knew, but with the hair extensions and ponytail, Shepard had to admit she looked pretty cool. Especially with her scarred waist, arms, and legs showing.

Sitting perfectly still, she allowed EDI to give her a sexy layer of makeup. With one last adjustment to her eye cybernetics, she was all ready to go.

Her crew was amused at her choice of attire, including Admiral Hackett. The Alliance lifer had shown up in uniform. Borrriiiiing.

But it was the last person to appear that had Shepard excited.

“Shepard, I swear if you have creeper parts around here I am done. Done!” Wrex bellowed from the entrance.

“I promise, Wrex, EDI didn’t decorate my apartment with creepers!”

Hackett and Joker did their best to keep a straight face as Wrex slowly made his way into the apartment. His steps measured and his eyes looking in every nook for what he feared most.

It was difficult not to look at him.

“Wrex,” Hackett greeted.

“Admiral.”

“Sit down, relax, enjoy the party,” Joker said with a smirk.

“Yeah, Wrex,” Shepard said, turning fully to the krogan. “Relax.”

Wrex’s eyes widened and his body froze before he fell to the floor. “I think I went too far,” Shepard said as EDI scanned the krogan. “Did I kill him?”

“No, Commander. He merely fainted.”

“Fainted,” Shepard repeated before bursting into laughter. EDI was right. No one would have expected creeper heads in place of her iris and pupils. Including Wrex.

Shepard sighed, her laughter dying down as she looked down at Wrex. Poor guy. But he was such an easy target.

“Rah, rah, ree! Kick ‘em in the knee!” Shepard cheered before bumping Wrex’s knee with her foot. “Rah, rah, rass! Kick ‘em in the ass!” Still no movement. “Rah, rah, raad’s! Kick ‘em in the quads!”

“Don’t. Even. Dare,” came the growled response.

Wrex steered clear of her the rest of the night, even though she’d returned her eyes back to their customary color. Music blared and alcohol flowed freely as the devil’s hour neared.

Zaeed had talked her into doing a few cheers and stunts before his attention found the normal dressed Justicar. That was a good thing since she couldn’t remember anymore from her time in high school.

Shepard sighed happily as she leaned against the piano. Her buzz was strong, and her home filled with drunks and laughter. It was wonderful.

“Got any other cheers, Shepard?”

“Admiral,” she flirted. “I’ve got a special one saved for you.”

“That so?”

Shepard hummed before launching herself at the only sober person in the room. “It requires privacy,” she whispered in his ear as her legs wrapped around his waist. “And a lot less clothing on you.”

“Who am I to argue with the Captain of the Alliance Cheer Team?” Whistles and catcalls followed them as Hackett carried her up the stairs.

“In my experience,” Samara said with a small smile. “The captain of the ball team always gets the cheer captain.”


End file.
